I don’t know that I’ve ever felt like such a failure as I do right now.  Today was a huge wake up call that I have no idea what I’m doing.  I feel like everything I’ve tried to do in my calling for the last month has been wrong, and I don’t really know how to move forward. The things I felt inspired to do have only brought frustration and confusion, and anger, really, to those I was just trying to help.

I don’t doubt that the Lord called me as I felt like I could see the steps that were in place to prepare me for this, but it is really hard to actually do it.  I don’t even think Junior High was as hard as this… I feel like so many people are just mad and frustrated and disappointed in me.  I know its not a popularity contest or anything like that.  I just wish something that I felt inspired to instigate would actually benefit someone or make them happy.

And to top it all off… Nigel beat me at the board game Mr. Jack tonight.  Ya, I’d say failure.


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We are a family of best friends. And this is a little bit of our story.

3 responses »

  1. Teresa Larsen says:

    Laura you are always so hard on yourself you are amazing. I wish I could be there to give you a hug and tell you that you are doing a good job even though I’m not a big hugger. It will work out I’m sorry Nigel bet you at Mr jack if it makes you feel better I lost settlers that week to Eric.

  2. You at least came close to beating me. You had a few good rounds where I didn’t think I was going to be able to come back.

  3. bloomiesblog says:

    What an interesting post to read today. Fast forward three months, and I see all of the things that I saw as failure at the time just needed a bit of time to evolve. I know patience is not my forte, but I’m grateful for the time that the Lord makes me wait, to see what can come of the spirit’s promptings. And to see that the Lord knows what he’s doing… timing and all!

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